family values.

i've been trying to stay away from this, but it's getting ridiculous. i will try to be as tasteful as possible. warning: a rant does follow. i may offend you. if you genuinely think i'm wrong, please let me know.

it has recently come out in the last few days that the 17-year-old daughter of john mccain's running mate is 5 months pregnant. what's mostly troubling about this to me is that any and all defense of her that i can find consists of, "but she's not going to abort!"

honestly, who cares?

let's talk about the mother. let's talk about teen pregnancy. let's talk about low birth weight, birth complications, life-altering circumstances. let's talk about the difference between a white, affluent, middle-class teenager getting pregnant and an inner-city minority teenager getting pregnant, and the example the former sets for the entire nation. hey, while we're at it, let's talk about a family, a white, middle-class, educated family where the mother and her daughter are pregnant at the same time (do the math... bristol is 5 months pregnant and her little brother is 4 months old). let's talk about what that communicates to women, about women, about parenthood and femininity. let's talk about a society obsessed with sex, a society that values women on their sexual attractiveness and availability, a society that equates love with sex.

why isn't anyone asking if bristol palin is going to college? or how about her soon-to-be husband? why isn't anyone talking about these young people at all? why is all the focus on the fetus?

here's a dirty little secret: heterosexual intercourse doesn't have to lead to pregnancy. really. it doesn't. there is no way that any affluent, middle-class girl who's fucking her boyfriend has to get pregnant. none. especially not if you have health insurance. birth control is fucking cheap. condoms are cheaper. unwanted pregnancies should, quite frankly, be unknown in the u.s. today. i am tempted, some of these days, to say that if you get pregnant and you didn't want to, then you are either a) selfish b) lazy c) ignorant or d) infused with a superficial, false-nostalgic view of sex and relationships. i feel sorry for people in the last two categories, and i don't think they (the categories) should exist.

i was raised an evangelical. let me tell you something, pregnant 17-year-olds are not part of the "family values" platform. i never, thank god, suffered through "abstinence-only" education. abstinence has its place. no one in their right mind can argue that the best way to avoid the problems or side effects of sex (read: diseases and babies) is not to not have sex. but i always wondered about the mindset of parents who didn't want their kids to know other ways to prevent them. when are they supposed to learn? between the wedding and the wedding night? "here are some condoms, honey, let me teach you how to use them before you check in to the hotel tonight." seriously? we're not living on farms anymore.

i don't think the poor girl should have been walloped all over the national news, but obviously, her parents don't agree. either that, or they have no idea how to handle the media. it's bristol's life, and she made decisions, and now she's going to have to live with them, but she's also 17, and she has to live with her mother's decisions too. this whole situation is monumentally unfair to her. but the conversations that should be happening, aren't. all we're getting is 1-dimensional kerfuffle about abortion. abortion is such a fucking minor question at this point, it's insane that that's all people are talking about.